Scottish Connections

Natasha Falconer

I was born in Thailand to a white father and Thai mother and moved to Scotland when I was 4. Since then, I have had countless racist experiences. What surprised me was when the other day, a friend of a friend claimed he believed that white people were more evolved, and he did not feel safe around "coloured" people.

Not once has someone of an "ethnic group" insulted me in a racial way. I  feel safer around these "coloured" people than a Scottish person as I have never been racially attacked by one, yet the amount of racial abuse recieved from those of Scottish decent.

In fact, although I am a British citizen, I have been made to feel like a foreigner most my life. No-one talks about my scottish heritage, in fact, it is ignored, and all questions asked I have been asked revolve around asia, due to the fact I look more asian than biracial.

All through school, I was called "Chinky", songs like "chinky chinky chinaman" sung to me on the playground, been told to "f*** off back to china". I've been kicked while being called "chinky", asked if I speak english, been told I sound scottish and speak really good English (I should, its my mother tongue).

I've even been called a "gook" a few times, which I find extremely offensive. Once, on my way to a night club, a group of girls started shouting chinky at me.

I previously thought that this was due to people not knowing me, and xenophobic attitudes. However, people upon meeting me aren't any better. One conversation with a man in a night club even treated me as if I was a prostitute due to my thai descent. The conversation I remember quite clearly.

Man: "Where do you come from?"

Me: "I was born in Thailand but have been here most my life."

Man: "So thailand eh? Would you give me a massage?"

I have been asked in the pub, "So have you been to the biggest city in asia, ching chong ching chong?"

Someone even asked if my dad had "mail ordered my mother".

These are the incidents I remember offhand, the rest, well there are too  many to even talk about. All the above comments however, all from Scottish people. I recently visited Thailand to see my family, and felt like I fitted in more, yet I am more Scottish than I am Thai. For the first time I didn't feel like an outsider.

If attitudes don't change I refuse to stay in this country, and I'm sure I'm not the only person who feels this way. Do Scottish people really want to be seen as a nation that drives people away due to their colour?